Monday, August 20, 2007
And Christmas....well, I just found an old wall quilt (can you find it in my sewing corner pic?) that I started 7 years ago that I think I may actually finish this year. Discovering it led me to thinking about snowy mornings, hot cocoa, the relatively relaxed pace of winter. Every year I promise myself that I will not rush around, I will plan my time so wisely that the holidays will finally be a time of contemplation, rest, and enjoyment with my family and friends. Then reality hits and I'm rushing around town or staying up late shopping online and just trying to keep my head above water, let alone contemplate anything. Maybe I shouldn't be so pessimistic...it is still only August after all. I am thinking of giving each child one special item that I know they will love and the rest of their gifts will be little trips and experiences here and there. They have so much, it's almost ridiculous. It makes me crazy and little sick to see how much they don't even use. They love to go places though, it might be money better spent if we take them on day trips and outings instead.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Honestly, playing S'math that late at night, with a fussy baby on my lap, and with my hopes dashed on getting any free time for myself and still getting to bed at a reasonable hour, wasn't all that much fun. However-seeing how happy the girls were, was fun, and going to bed after midnight-totally worth it! Good night!!
Monday, August 13, 2007
My dear friend, Leeza and I were chatting tonight, I can’t remember what about, when she mentioned that her husband, Davis, told her once "it's as if you had a sign on your back saying, 'Please, tell me your life story.'"
I had to chuckle at that because...yes....that IS how you feel when you first meet her and everytime after. There's something....that certain....you know.....je ne sais quoi.....that makes you sigh-and just start talking. Leeza is one of those rare people, who does not conceal who she is. She is who she is, very real and expecting the same of you. And you know it, somehow. For me, that was startling and educational because I was ALL about determining who a person truly was and if they were trustworthy before I spoke a word that really meant anything. So, I watched her (out of the corner of my eye), listened, and learned how to be real-how to be real and how to be a friend. (As in, she lets you say perfectify in conversation and doesn't say a word about it!) Just know...I was very, very tired and just trying to get my point across about perfecting something.
I started to agree with her husband Davis, with the statement that titles this post. She pointed out its negative connotation. She joked that perhaps she should have this written on her tombstone. Well, being as serious as I tend to be, I didn't find that funny in the least. However, we had a great laugh over the phrase and I loved the sound of it so much, I just had to use it in tonights mental meandering. This is, afterall, what I love to do!
Really though, Leeza should have her own blog. She says she doesn’t know what she would write about. Let me tell you what she would write about. She’d write about her intriguing interests…from early American history to antiquated medications, from her desire to see people understand the truth of who Christ is and his offer to save us to innovative quilting techniques (never HEARD nor CONCEIVED of before!), it would be fascinating material. I know-it’s fascinating simply to listen to. The humor she uses to relate the antics of her kiddos would cause you to spontaneously laugh out loud, later that day, long after you had finished reading.
Several authors who wrote articles printed in the magazine “This Old Schoolhouse” re-introduced me to this phenomena called blogging. In my little neck of the woods, it is indeed still very much the unknown. So I feel very cutting edge here! Anyway, I liked several of the articles so much that I checked out the authors blogs. Suddenly, I was in the land of like-minded people. Then I discovered I was pregnant with #5 and nobody I knew had that many children, so I searched for blogs of mothers of five for encouragement. It was my refuge when I tired of the wide eyed looks as people gasped, “You’re pregnant again?” (I could write a whole other post on that!) Hint: When an expecting mother is tired, hungry and bloated to the gills- there just isn’t ever a time or place to say such a thing. Just smile and tell her how beautiful she looks. (Just as Leeza did.) I never believed her but boy, I was always thankful to hear it. Blogs offer refreshing places where we can share the familiar struggles and glean real encouragement from women who are in the same season of life.
I’ll let you know if Leeza takes the plunge. I can’t quite describe it but there’s just something about her that you’d all love. (Besides then we could travel to blogging conventions together!)
Sunday, August 12, 2007
I've noticed more and more lately, the things in life that mean the most to me, I don't prioritize as being the most important. Doesn't that seem weird? Instead things that shouldn't be (and really, aren't) are what I appear to spend most of my precious time on. Such as cleaning and organizing the house, decorating, and chores, chores, chores. It's so highly ironic (as anyone who really knows me) because my house is such a mess! But there it is-it's true and I never even get ahead of it, not by a long shot.
Our pastor brought this up today. He asked us to specifically choose one thing that we knew we were called by Him to do in this life. I believe God trusted us with these children to love and raise them and teach them about Him. (And if we aren't put here to live for ourselves but to know and love God, well, I should be learning that myself). Then the pastor asked us, basically, how are we doing in that one thing. Well, honestly, I'd have to say that I believe Sean and the kids would think the house and my projects were the most important thing to me, simply by my actions. They can't read my mind. I even have to remind myself, to do what I should be doing (like looking the kids in the eyes and spending time with them, not racing around working, talking to them as I do so). However, there is that saying-what you want to do, you will find the time to do. So, it may be more true that I do prefer doing my projects than spending time playing games or being outside-those things that build relationships. Because that's what I like to spend my time and energy on.
So, there, that's quite a revelation for me....and all on a pretty public forum. That's an interesting experience. Ever feel like you don't really know yourself?
Hmmm....well, I don't want it that way, that's for sure. I don't want to waste my life mindlessly like that! That's crazy! Who cares about that stuff? I mean, it's well and good, and I need some order to function in a healthy manner. But not ahead of my relationships...which brings me to part 2....
I'm a good one to say, all the time, boy, I need to get together with....(insert friends name)....more often. I'm just so busy!! (whine, whine, whine) I can endlessly bemoan the fact that time flies by and I've lost touch with someone. But really, how lame is that? I have the same amount of time as anyone else....and it's not because of the kids because they LOVE to have company. It's ME....I feel like I've got to have the house all perfect before I can invite anyone over. Which is ridiculous because 1) like I said above, I never get ahead of the housework and 2) it's usually destroyed and I don't even care, 10 minutes after they've arrived.
So, I've got to find a balance here...and the first thing I'm going to start with is: instead of running around in the morning, I'm going to make it a priority to eat breakfast (or at least have my smoothie) with Sean before he leaves for work. I'm also going to play outside or a game with the kids once in the morning and once in the afternoon. I've still got responsibilities so I can't play all day. The kids do help me a lot around the house, sometimes that's a perfect opportunity for some interesting conversations. I wonder why playing is so hard anyway?? Sean is great at it, he plays all the time with the kids.
Above all, I'll remember, God gave us this wonderful family. Like someone once told me, "This isn't a dress rehearsal....you only have one shot." It's a matter, as I'm reminded once again, of thinking on the right things. There are many good things and then there are the best things.
Saturday, August 11, 2007
What you don't see are the children running around and how tired we are after an afternoon at the Biodome. Don't we look remarkably peaceful? Well, we look more dazed than peaceful....
My best friend took this of us in Montreal about 4 years ago. This is one of my favorite pictures. He naturally looks good in photos, I don't. I like this picture so much, it's in my living room, it's my screensaver, and it's the one I send to my family and friends. It's everywhere and I never tire of it.
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
As the year began, the most apparent change for me was my freedom-I just had to be back by noon for the kindergarten bus. No more regimented mornings, I no longer had to keep track of 5 different things at the same time. I didn’t appreciate the structure back then. Not to worry though, 2 year old J and 4 month old J have me well in line these days. It’s a good thing that schedules work well in this house.
Back in the home schooling days, we usually began our school year with the Not Back to School picnic at Mills Park. There, many of our fellow home school friends would rejoice that we were somewhat prolonging our summer. Through the fall, we would begin our days slowly, completing our studies by lunch time (on the good days) and spending the afternoons at various places or just relaxing before the evening commitments. Realizing the control they held over their own day tempered their lack of interest in the less fascinating subjects like spelling and grammar.
Surprisingly, their interest in other subjects grew by leaps and bounds by the simple fact that there were few distractions and many options on how to teach and learn the material. Music and art lessons, co-op meetings, writing club, and time spent with friends rounded out our days. However, the driving to and fro from all of these very good things was also very wearing. When your friends live 30 min. away, you just don’t see them as often. That was something I missed for the kids; seeing your buddies everyday. Our end of the year assessment and testing affirmed that great academic things were occurring but the equally important social time was definitely lacking.
There are such a wide range of home schooling philosophies from super structured, classical literature-centered to a relaxed, unschooling approach, let-the-child-decide-for-themselves-what-to-spend-their-time-studying. Unschoolers we are not, I definitely like good literature and history and feel it is absolutely essential to understand where we came from to see where we are going. Cliché, I know, but I don’t have time to figure out how to say it any other way. The Well Trained Mind by Susan Wise Bauer was what I used to put together our home school program. I highly recommend it for suggestions if you feel the need to supplement your child’s education, otherwise known as “after schooling”.
Most importantly, I see now that just as there is not one size fits all direction for parenting, the same is true for educating your children. From learning style differences, to individual talents that need to be encouraged, to your own opinion of what is important or not….all of these influence what direction your instruction will take. Some people send one child to public or private school and home school another. Some children take a few classes at a school and do the rest at home. Some learn in the car, via DVDs, reading, and discussion while driving between music lessons or dance classes. These are usually those who have some incredible talent who are very lucky to be able to receive their education outside of the traditional school. Otherwise they might not be able to develop their gift. So, as for our family, we are taking it year by year. This year, our kids are again going to school. If you know our toddler, well, then the reason is obvious! But I can’t promise that will be the case next year. I find that circumstances have a way of shifting. Since we have this incredible freedom of choice, we’d be crazy not to thoughtfully consider it.